Do you ever feel like “Can I pick your brain?” or “Let me buy you a coffee” is really a request for free consulting? It happens to me all the time.

After 12 years as a consultant, I am learning to value my time and expertise more intentionally. One of the best phrases came from my friend Jennifer Wah: “I will tell you the what, but not the how.” (Jennifer explained that she would tell you what you need, what I would do, what approaches might work…but you hire me for details on how it’s done and how to make it happen).

A few strategies that have helped me:
• Share your process, not the finished solution.
• Ask what someone wants to discuss before agreeing to meet.
• Recognize when a casual conversation becomes a consulting session.
• Offer a paid advisory call or strategy session as the next step.
• Remember that generosity should be intentional, not expected.

One phrase I use is:
“That is the kind of question I normally address through a consulting engagement. I would be happy to discuss how we could work together.”

Clients are not paying only for an hour of your time, they are paying for the years of experience that allow you to see the problem and identify the right path more quickly.

How do you handle requests to “pick your brain”?